Glitches in the matrix.
I’m freaking out
SAYS CLARK KENT THE MOST BORING ONE DIMENSIONAL SUPERHERO EVER????
You and I have very different opinions on what constitutes a one dimensional character
CLARK KENT IS AN ANGELIC TREAT
Imagine having braces during the apocalypse. no one can take your braces off. And you just have to accept that you’ll have braces forever.
i want a novel focused around a character with braces during the apocalypse and the entire plot of the story revolves around their search for an orthodontist who is still alive and they sort of accidentally save the world in the process
Titled: Brace for It.
Take note: this is how to properly disarm someone. Always go to the outside of the arm, not the inside.
ah yes I have been doing it wrong the whole time it seems cowering in fear was not the first step
When someone expects me to blindly stride into a childish trap and, electrocute myself.
Can you imagine the conversation though?
Queen: I’m going
Chief of Staff: But, Your Majesty, the security risks…
Queen: I’m going I want cake
Chief of Staff:
Chief of Staff:
Queen: I want cake
Don’t tell me you “understand” why I’m vegan. If you understood you’d be vegan, too.
Understanding doesn’t equal agreement. I understand why Walter White started to cook meth, doesn’t mean I’m gonna buy an RV and a barrel of methylamine.
AND STOP STARIN’ AT ME WITH THEM BIG OLD EYES
what do i focus on here
try focusing on making you life and the lives of your loved ones better each and every day
everyone’s having their mid-life crises at like 19
just another day of not being rich and famous
this is gospel for the fallen ones…
you know when i die i’ll probably just be in the afterlife blogging like
"heaven has no free wi-fi? fuck this shit i’m going to hell"
how do you know hell has wifi
satan owes me several favors
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